Welcoming a new baby into an already existing family can be a very
exciting time for most family members. There is however, one situation
that one would be wise to consider when anticipating the arrival of a
newborn. In families with a young toddler already, this can be a cause for
concern. The young child is still somewhat a baby himself and he might
not be as receptive to the new addition as the rest of the family.
Giving considerable thought to this scenario beforehand can prove to be a
wise and valuable step in helping your youngster to adjust to the
changing circumstances.
Fortunately, there are many things you can do before your newborn ever
arrives that can help to put your toddler or young child at ease. The
first step would be to make sure and include him in the process. You can
begin to do this as soon as you realize you are expecting another baby.
Make a formal but kid-friendly announcement to him by sitting him down
with a snack and having a short little conversation to tell him about
the baby. Young children tend to listen to the voice of their parents
far more at meal or snack times, than when they are watching television or
engaged in some other activity. This is due in part to the naturally
short attention span of young children. It would also seem to be the
case, due to the fact that shared meals and snacks add a sense of nurturing
to an otherwise ordinary and routine day.
Once you have had a conversation about the new baby with your little
one, talk about it often and throughout the day. Ask your child what toys
he would like to show the baby or how he would like to decorate the
nursery. This will instill a sense of involvement in him, as well as make
him feel that he has something to contribute to the new arrival. When
you are shopping for newborn clothing let him pick out an outfit or two.
When he later sees the baby in the clothing he personally picked, you
can only imagine how proud he will be.
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Another great opportunity to show your little one that he is part of
the process, is at the baby shower. Many times when young children see all
the attention and baby gifts lavished on the new baby, they begin to feel
frustrated and left out. You might consider asking a few of your closest
guests to purchase an inexpensive new big brother gift for him as well. If this is
not possible, consider purchasing them yourself and presenting them to
him at your shower. There are many big brother and big sister gifts
available to choose from these days. You can get anything from T-shirts
that say "big brother or sister" to big sibling gift baskets that include
an assortment of older sibling inspired gifts. This simple gesture will
go a long way in helping your little one to feel as if your baby shower
includes him as well.
Be sure to explain to your child what will take place when you go into
labor. As you leave for the hospital, lovingly inform him that you will
be bringing the new baby home when you return from the hospital. Some
children are so shocked when they realize that the new baby they have
heard so much about all these months, is actually going to be living in
their house! This is why many times they tell mommy to just take it back
to the hospital! If possible, have your young one visit you in the
hospital before or after the baby's arrival. This would be a good time to
review all the things you have been sharing with him throughout your
pregnancy. Help him to feel a part of the team.
It would be good to keep in mind that a little upset is normal when
bringing home a newborn to an already existing family. However, with a
little planning, preparation, and loving concern for the needs and cares
of your existing little one, you can ensure that he will welcome the
new arrival with open arms and a heart full of things to share.
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